Forgiveness

Today is exactly one year from the day i started blogging. However, I'm writting this day with a totally different spirit. Last year, i started off with unforgiveness in me. At this very moment, i dare to say that i'm a free person and have experienced the power of forgiveness tremendously in my life...Praise God!
And so i thought i shud share sth about forgiveness to commemorate dis day- How forgiveness actually changed my life in 2008!

Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. -Colossians 3:13-

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Adapted from Cleo december 2008
Most folk go through life living with the certainty that people who hurt us deserve to be punished, not forgiven. what's more, we feel that it is us who have to deliver this punishment; that it is our God-given duty to smite these cruel souls on behalf of all good people on the planet; that we have to make them pay.
Mostly, we simply choose to withhold our forgiveness under the mistaken belief that the bad guys actually care. We assume they need ourforgiveness to move on with their lives, when in fact, they don't.
The sad truth is this : we can live without the forgiveness of the people we have wronged; but without being able to forgive the people who wrong us, we die.

What Forgiveness is Not

• Forgiveness is not forgetting

By forgiving the people who hurt us, we are not erasing painful past experiences from our memory. We cannot forget, nor should we. Those experiences, and even the pain they caused, have a great deal to teach us, both about not being victimised again and about not victimising others.

• Forgiveness is not condoning

When we forgive, we lessen the past's impact on our present and future, but this does not alter the fact that the injuries and injustices we experienced were painful and unfair when the ordeal occurred originally. Forgiving the people who hurt us does not mean we are saying that what was done was in any way acceptable. In fact, true forgiveness cannot occur while we are in any way denying, minimising, justifying or condoning the actions that harmed us.

• Forgiveness is not absolution

Forgiveness does not give us the right to get all self-righteous and to play God, temting though it may be. It does not let the people who have hurt us off the hook. We do not absolved them of all responsibility for their actions, and one day, they will have to make their own peace with their past.

• Forgiveness is not self-sacrifice

Forgiveness is not martyrdom, tolerance or "being nice". There is no such thing as half hearted forgiveness. We either forgive or we don't.

• Forgiveness is not a clear-cut decision

Forgiveness cannot be forced, and no matter how sincerely we want to let go of the past, we cannot schedule it to happen next week, next month or even next year. Forgiveness is what happens naturally as a result of confronting painful past experiences and healing old wounds.

Adapted from Forgiveness : How To Make Peace With Your Past and Get on With Your Life by Sidney and Suzanne Simon

"Forgiveness is all about working through the unfinished business, letting go of the pain and moving in for your sake. You forgive so that you can finally get rid of the excess emotional baggage that has been weighing you down and holding you back; so you can be free to do and be whatever you decide"

Learning to forgive will save you a whole lot of money, time and unhappiness, because you don't forgive the other person for his sake; you forgive for yourself.